Groom Speech

Today we’re diving into a key moment of your big day: The Groom Speech – that 5-minute tightrope walk between “charming husband” and “rambling moron.” As someone who’s sat through a lot of groom speeches I’ve put together my top tips for ensuring you can get through the speech without any upsets.

Whilst the speeches can come in many different forms, it almost always needs to include the following:

• Thanks

  • See below for the ‘key’ people to be thanked

• A brief summary of how you met your bride

• Some generic chat about how X-rated your stag was and thanking your groomsmen for this.

• Some mention of the bridesmaids supporting the bride

• An ending of how amazing your ‘new wife’ looks

There’s a lot more that can be added and if you’re a natural speech giver then this is probably pretty obvious. However, you are currently reading this newsletter so chances are you are not…

Tip 1: Don’t forget the Thank Yous 

This isn’t the Oscars, but you do need to thank a few people:

• Your new in-laws (for raising someone exceptional – and letting you marry them).

• Your own parents (insert joke about what a great job they did with you / didn’t do with one of your siblings).

• The guests (insert classic comment about them coming for the free food/drink).

• Suppliers - not always necessary, especially if you had loads. However, if you’re going to start listing them all out, make sure you don’t miss out any (unless you did that on purpose because you weren’t happy…)

Pro tip: Don’t list everyone. This isn’t LinkedIn. Prioritise those who’ve contributed meaningfully (cough…Pristine Events…cough).

Tip 2: Tell Your Love Story (But Keep It PG, Please)

Now’s your chance to tell your version of how you met your partner – the one where you clarify exactly who came onto who.

Throw in a funny anecdote or two (bonus points if it’s self-deprecating). Did she fancy your flatmate first? Perfect. Did she think your name was Neil for the first three weeks? Even better.

Tip 3: Talk about the groomsmen/bridesmaids (Like You Mean It)

Your groomsmen and the bridesmaids deserve a shout-out – they’ve dealt with group chats, suit fittings, last-minute dramas, and probably one too many “urgent” tasks involving Cash and Carry alcohol and flares.

So give them a mention, thank them for their support, and maybe throw in an anecdote – light teasing only, no chats about indecency/illegality/infidelity. This is still a wedding, not a stag do debrief.

Example:
“To my groomsmen – thanks for being the best team I could’ve asked for. And by ‘best,’ I obviously mean functional adults who showed up in the right suit and didn’t lose the rings.”

Bonus: Give the bridesmaids a compliment too. “To the bridesmaids – you’ve been amazing, supportive, and honestly made all the photos better just by standing near us.”

Trust me, charm and gratitude go a lot further than trauma flashbacks.

Tip 4: Compliment Your Partner (Like You Mean It)

Time to be sweet. Yes, I know – feelings. But this is your chance to tell everyone how brilliant, beautiful, and wildly patient your other half is for agreeing to marry someone who didn’t know cufflinks had a direction.

Important: Avoid clichés. She doesn’t want to be called your “rock” especially when her bridesmaids have no doubt all referred to her as theirs.

Step 5: Keep It Short and Charming

Your speech should be like a good wedding canapé: bite-sized, satisfying, and not something people have to politely chew through for ten minutes. If you’ve made a powerpoint or have props then you’ve probably googled ‘best man speech’ rather than ‘groom speech.’

Aim for 5-7 minutes tops.

Step 6: End with a Toast

Wrap it up with a heartfelt toast to your partner, maybe the parents, and definitely the guests – especially if they’ve put up with a three-day intercultural wedding in the arse end of nowhere.

Raise that glass. Smile. And do not drop the mic. It’s rented.

Final Thoughts

Remember, this speech is about being you – preferably a relatively sober version. The room is filled with people you know and love (for the most part). It’s not a presentation/ work. Just speak from the heart and it’ll be over before you know it and you can get back to enjoying the most special day of your life.

Lots of Love
Nim
Pristine Events

💬 I’ve probably mentioned this before more than once, but please print your speech/ write it in small book that says groom on it. I detest people reading off their phones as it looks like they just wrote it. If I see you using your phone for your speech I will repeatedly ring it whilst you’re reading from it.