I Asked 38 000 Women What Their Biggest Wedding Regret Was And This Is What They Said....😮👰🏽‍♀️

Recently I asked on my @anjandpri blog page for previous brides to share what, if anything, they regretted about their wedding day. That’s not because I want to bring up any negativity or shade, but I think it’s important to know a) nothing will ever go 100% to plan (even if you plan to the nth degree like me) and b) it may be useful as learning points for planning your future wedding or even other events!

1) Photo & Video Team & Photo Video Planning (Poses, Timings, Type of Photography, Group pictures etc)

This first point is a long one but definitely an important one! Photo and video issues or regrets was the most common answer! A lot of brides said they didn’t research very much into the team they hired and as a result ended up with photos they weren’t happy with and don’t want to look back on. It’s so important to take time to research into photographers and make sure their style aligns with you. Some do more fine art photography and some do more natural photography, some do more posed shots and some do more candid ‘in the moment’ style shots. The editing style is also another thing to consider. I knew I wanted my photo style to be very bright and airy so only looked for photographers who did this. The more you look into this, the more you will start to see what style is your vibe.

Another regret brides had with photo/video teams is not clarifying a timeline. This is SO important and this is why having your coordinator on board is key. I met a bride last year who told me the videographer missed her first dance because he was outside on a cigarette break and wasn’t aware that it was about to happen. She was understandably heartbroken and the videographer felt so bad but nobody had given him any warning about the first dance. Make sure your timeline includes things like getting ready shots, venue shots (without guests in it), key moments (walking down the aisle, vows, reaction shots, speeches, first dance etc) and also any break times where there isn’t much happening so photo/video are aware.

Brides also mentioned they hadn’t factored in enough time or were running late so as a result didn’t have enough time for important photos such as couple shots or family shots. So many of them said they were really disappointed when they look back they didn’t even have a photo with their mum/dad, sibling or very many couple shots. Make sure you plan buffer time for photos as things will inevitably run a little late and you don’t want to miss out on that. Following on from this point, having a pre-planned moodboard with poses and inspo truly helps to speed up the photo/video taking time. Even if you’re not a ‘photo person’, I would highly recommend you having a few poses/inspo pics ready that you can imitate.

And lastly, brides who didn’t book a videographer really regretted this. It’s easy to think you’d prefer just having photos but there are some things that videos capture better like genuine reactions or feelings. If you are budget conscious, try and book a team who do both photo and video and it can work out more cost effective!

2) Coordinator +- Planner

So obviously I may be biased with this, but I do truly believe that you need an on the day coordinator at the very least. This was the second most popular answer. Traditionally brides would delegate to their families and friends, but in this day and age, there are so many suppliers and intricacies involved that it’s hard for them to keep up. Also, you want the closest people to you to enjoy your day and not be running around stressed. Even if you’re the most organised bride, why would you want to risk the idea of having to deal with issues or last minute changes on the biggest day of your life? If you are going to invest in good caterers, decor, bar staff, DJ etc, why not invest in someone who you fully trust to make sure they all work together in sync and that your dream wedding becomes a reality?

3) Key moments with family

This takes me back to my first point about timeline planning. I’m not exaggerating in saying that I literally make a timeline for everyone involved in the wedding; bride & groom, bridal & groom family, bridesmaids & groomsmen, all suppliers and guests if the couple are on board with this too. There’s nothing worse than things running late, having ten minutes for family photos and then your family being nowhere to be found as they are unaware! In the manic-ness of the day, it’s also important to take some moments to be present with your parents and siblings. You won’t get that time back!

4) Spending enough time with guests

It’s hard to physically see and thank every guest at your wedding but they do really appreciate when the bride and groom makes time for them! A lot of brides regretted missing their drinks reception as this is a great chance to mingle and also relax before the reception. I think previously couples avoided this as they wanted a surprise entrance for the reception, but honestly speaking, guests will still be as hyped even if they’ve seen you in the drinks reception. You may also really appreciate a bit of downtime of just having a drink and chat too!

5) Collecting keepsakes as memories or preserving floral bouquets

This was one of my biggest regrets. I didn’t mention to my coordinator/planner to keep stationery from each of my events as keepsakes. I’m such a sentimental person and I loved all the small details but completely forgot to allocate for someone to collect it all. If you’re like me in that sense, make sure you tell your coordinator/planner/family member to collect the relevant things and keep it aside for you! Also if you plan on preserving your floral bouquet, make sure you keep it safe as you will have to send it out for preservation a few days after your wedding.

6) HMUA Stress

The biggest regret brides had with HMUAs was not booking a trial and as a result being unhappy with how they looked on their wedding day. I know this is an extra cost girls but it’s something you NEED to allocate in your budget. If you don’t feel like you look good on your wedding day, it will show in your mood, your confidence and as a result your photos. Having a trial will also allow you to make any changes or tweaks so that you’re really happy on your wedding day.

7) EAT

So many brides said they didn’t even get a chance to eat on their wedding day. I completely understand you may not have an appetite or may be running on adrenaline, but take some time to slow down, eat and enjoy the amazing food you probably spent hours picking! It will also stop you from crashing later in the day or feeling the alcohol too quickly!

8) Weather- Sun/Wind/Rain etc

ALWAYS have a plan B! The weather can never be guaranteed so don’t forget to contingency plan. If it’s a heatwave, make sure there’s fans/AC, readily available water and shade. If it’s a windy day, think about securing any decor properly and avoiding any loose items (programmes, confetti, signs). If it’s due to rain, make sure the indoor plan is in place and that there is umbrellas or cover for any outdoor aspects.

9) DO YOU- lowkey and cute vs being extra AF

I was sad to read that a lot of you had either done ‘too much’ or ‘not enough’ because of society/social media/family pressures. It’s easy to get influenced by other factors, but you have to try and shake it off and remember what’s important to you both. If you’re a low-key person and don’t really care about small details, then why would you put in that extra effort? However if you’ve been dreaming about this day since you were little and want to live out your princess fairytale dream, then do it! As long as whatever you do, it’s for you, you will be happy.

Hope this helps any upcoming 2023 brides!

Love,

Priya